i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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