put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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