i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I just found puke in my bra..
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
