If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
