Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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