I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
