So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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