Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Of course I have a pirate flag
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
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