i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS