Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
This house was built for laser tag.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
