is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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