I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
