glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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