Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
