Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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