Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
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The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
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He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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