you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
You pole danced in your parka.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize