I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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