My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
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