Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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