why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
