Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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