ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
