I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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