absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
