Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
