So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Welp...herpes.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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