Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
