we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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