Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
