He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Randomize
