i just had sex bonerless
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Randomize