Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
