Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
My bed smells like the plague
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
