is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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