told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
