why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I need to calm my uterus...
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Randomize