and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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