she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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