so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i just google imaged poop.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
She needs sedatives and a leash
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
