Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
