I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Randomize
