So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
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