Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
