You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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