Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
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