i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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