i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
