D3 body, D1 cock
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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