Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Houston, we have a blender
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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